I closed out the last year and a half of my nursing career as a home health and hospice nurse. Many people find it difficult to understand how anyone can enjoy taking care of those that are dying. “That must be so hard,” I heard time after time. And, of course, there were those times when it was hard. Times when the prodigal child didn’t come home; dismissing their last chance to hold their parent’s hand. Times when the dying wanted nothing to do with hearing the gospel message of life after death. Times when a child closed their eyes for the last time as Mom and Dad attempted to gather strength from each other, only to find neither one had any left.

Although there were these situations when I would leave a home with tears on my cheeks, there were more times that I left with joy in my heart. Joy that this person was at peace with whatever might happen in the next 24 hours. Joy, that relationships had been restored in the nick of time. Joy, that families were willing to give the dying one last gift and care for them in their own homes. A great example of this is my own neighbor – 91 year old Mary Lou. Not one of her four children lived in South Dakota. But each one of them came to take turns for a week or two at a time so their mother could finish out her days in her beloved home amid familiar surroundings. How much that meant to Mary Lou!

Ecclesiastes 7:2-4 tells us that it is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting. The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning because there we learn what matters most. Many times I was called out in the middle of the night by family who’s loved one had passed. As much as I treasure good sleep, I never minded these calls. This is where I learned how much the deceased meant to those closest to them. Once I would get to the house there were tasks to be done. After a brief examination of the patient, I would notify the family’s choice of a mortuary to attend the deceased. While waiting for their arrival I would destroy the patient’s medications as is required by law and ready the body for transport by the funeral home staff. I would make notes as to family physician and pharmacy to notify in the morning. But the most meaningful and heartwarming part of my night was to listen to the family share the wonderful stories and memories of their loved one. (Most families that choose to care for a loved one in their home at the end of life are families where relationships are valued.)  I felt it a great privilege to have been invited into this exclusive world of remembrances. It was an hour of learning what the deceased had done while living that mattered most to these loved ones left behind.

David Brooks, a New York Times columnist has this to say about the way we live our lives: There are two kinds of virtues – those that look good on a resume and those you want said at your funeral. Sometimes they overlap, though often they seem to compete. When in doubt, always choose the eulogy virtues.

On these nights (and some days as well) I discovered what virtues are most important to the majority of us. I heard stories of honesty, generosity, compassion, contentment, integrity, courage, humor, and many other qualities that would look mighty fine on a resume in my opinion.

When my own father passed away five years ago, I felt a nudge to share one last story of a virtue that is hard to find these days – the virtue of clean speech. It wasn’t easy to address the congregation at such an emotional time, but I had to share what it meant to me that I had never heard Dad speak a swear word in the sixty years that I knew him. His most used expressions of exasperation were “shucks” and “that’s the berries.”

I can’t help but wonder what my children, siblings, grandchildren, nieces and nephews might say about me once the last heartbeat has beaten. Will I be thought of fondly or do I have some work to do while I still have the time? Will the memories they bring up around the kitchen table diffuse the somber sting of death? I would like nothing more than to know that laughter and smiles were shared on my behalf.

I am grateful for the opportunities I had as a hospice nurse. It was indeed a place that I learned what matters most.

Until next month, keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

 

 

 

It never changed through thirteen years of school. I was always the most vertically challenged person in my class. By the time I was in 5th grade, I no longer had to wait for the music teacher to tell me where to stand for the annual Christmas concert – I marched to my position – left lower row, outside corner.

Children are inclined to gloat when they surpass the height of their same sex parent – We and most do. Studies have shown that boys typically rise 1-2% higher than their fathers and girls tower over mothers by 3-6 %. As much as it would have pleased me to be one of those statistics, it wasn’t in my bucket. Somehow, my percentage was dumped in my sister’s bucket who surpasses our mother’s 5’2″ by at least 4 inches.

Needless to say, I’ve heard my share of “short jokes” and/or not so subtle insinuations related to my stature. Grade school classmates affectionately called me Shrimp. My high school classmates razzed me about the stack of pillows I needed to see over the steering wheel.  And, as an adult there were incidents that happened, too. Let’s see…I was nearly kicked out of the hometown Home Show when I came home for a visit from college. I had sailed past the sign at the door…ANYONE 12 YEARS OR AGE OR YOUNGER MUST BE ACCOMPANIED BY AN ADULT.  Home Show Security (the business owner at the first booth) confronted me. I whipped out my driver’s license and found it quite rewarding to watch his response. And…when I was six months pregnant and already in what seemed like full bloom, I was given a pair of  size 13 men’s shoes as a gag gift at our hospital Christmas party. “So you can see your toes, again,” the presenter announced. Then theirs my cowboy nephew who’s built like two  fence posts upended on each other, that has affectionately dubbed me “Shorty” and doesn’t want to let me forget it. There’s even been an occasional positive experience.  It’s not every 30 year old that still has candy passed to them through the drive-through window at the bank. (Did not apply if I was driving.)

For the most part, I handle these things with grace, but occasionally something hits me wrong.  So it was, one day when I was working as an orthopedic clinic nurse in Laramie, WY. We had several satellite clinics that we flew to. The surgeons employed their own full-time pilot, and Randy was a personable young fellow. It was his duty to keep us safe in the skies. Randy took his job seriously; if he didn’t think it was safe to fly, we didn’t.

This particular day we were headed to Fort Morgan, Colorado. Randy didn’t always come to the clinic before heading to the airport, but this morning he did. I was on one of the several phones in the hallway with the Fort Morgan personnel as Randy came up the hallway.  He realized, by the course of the conversation that I was talking to the Fort Morgan folks. He waited for me to finish, and when I hung up we took off down the hall together. We chit-chatted for a minute or two, but then out of the blue, Randy peers down over his mustache and says, “How’ s the weather down there?”

I threw out my arm with more force than you would imagine a 5 foot, small framed woman would possess, and landed it squarely across Randy’s abdomen. He gave an “umpf” as he bent forward, astounded at what I had just done. After regaining his balance, Randy stared at me like I owed him an explanation. No worries – I had already planned to give him one. “Randy,” I said with lips pinched, “I get short jokes all the time, and this morning I’m in no mood.” (Most likely due to the fact that the Fort Morgan personnel had 5 more patients on their roster list than I did; charts I would have to locate within the next 10 minutes.)

Randy shook his head as if clearing the cobwebs from the crevices. “Oh, I get it,” he finally said, starting to laugh. This hyped my irritation even more.  I found myself glaring at this pompous man who dared to laugh at my expense. Amid continued chuckles, Randy was just about to return a well deserved surprise to me.  “I just wanted to know what the weather was like in Fort Morgan.”

Oh crap…if there had been a thorn bush nearby, I would have crawled under it.  Of course…it all made sense NOW. With less than a half hour to be in the air, Randy’s mind was focused on weather. Only then did I remember the severe weather warnings I had heard on the way to work that morning.

Wow…how easy it was to misunderstand Randy’s intentions! I’m willing to bet it’s happened to all of us at one time or another – either we misunderstood someone or they misunderstood us. I couldn’t get around it – I crawled out from under the thorn bush and apologized.

The Message Bible had not been published when this story took place.  But, had it been and had I taken Proverbs 8:25 to heart, it may have saved me a bucketful of embarrassment.  Don’t jump to conclusions – there may be a perfectly good explanation for what you just saw (or heard in my case).

Until next month (I publish on the first Monday of the month) keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

If you enjoy this style of writing, check out my book page to find out how you can get my Christian Fiction novels.

Riding my horse, Ginger, across the soft meadow, the sweet smell of clover drifts upwards. My eyes naturally gravitate downward to observe the many rounded white and purple blooms that are scattered generously throughout the meadow. But as I gaze over the gently waving landscape beneath me, it is a sea of not only clover, but species of bluestem grasses, grama grasses, purpletops and many others I do not know the names of. All I know is that the carpet is so thick that a prairie chicken’s nest would not be seen until Ginger cracked an egg. This is a snapshot in my mind from years ago, but thankfully, each year when I visit the home ranch, the picture has been redeveloped – for now.

My dad would tell me, as I was trying to understand things,  that the meadows looked good because they were  sub-irrigated. When he would see my questioning look, he would explain that this meant there was an underground water supply that laid near the surface. Because of this, we had no need of pivot systems to grow great hay for our cattle. Also, because of this water supply near the surface it would have been best had we not had a basement in our house. Many times, when running an errand to grab something from the deep-freeze downstairs,my socks became saturated with ground water, seeping up through the cement floor.

This vast water supply is called the Ogallala Aquifer. It underlies an estimated 174,000 square miles of the Central Plains and spans into portions of eight states. It holds as much water as Lake Huron – nearly 3 billion acre feet of the valuable resource. It is considered a “fossil water” meaning it originated a very long time ago from melted glaciers. It is the major source of irrigation water throughout the eight state area where it lies. This aquifer provides the foundation for the large percentage of the food supply that feeds our nation. Extraordinary amounts of water are taken from it yearly, taking its tole on the water levels. In one Kansas study of the aquifer it has been shown that the water table in some western counties has dropped by as much as two feet per year. This water supply is considered a non-renewable resource, and alarmingly – if depleted,  is estimated to take over 6000 years to replenish naturally through rainfall. This same study also suggests that this depletion could happen in the next 50 years. Thankfully, many scientists and environmentalists realize this possibility and are working on solutions to the problem.

My great niece  – age seven, and her three younger brothers, live on the ranch I grew up on. It would sadden my heart, to see Gracelynn one day, riding across that same meadow kicking up dust and scattering sand-burrs. It’s anyone’s guess what might happen to the Ogallala Aquifer in the future.

But there’s a water supply that doesn’t have to be guessed at.  It’s a water source that quenches our thirst for the soul. Jesus is that living water. In John 7:37-38 Jesus tells us, “If you are thirsty, come to me! If you believe in me, come and drink! He promises to fill us with the living water from the well that always has enough – for anyone that asks. Don’t be timid about asking for your cup of living water. It is the water that sustains me, day in and day out – always renewable. And there’s always enough to share!

Until next month, keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

If this type of writing appeals to you, check out my book page (may have to scroll down a few entries) to see how to obtain either of my Christian Fiction books.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When Stan and I married we created a blended family. Along with Stan came Juneau – an Australian Shepherd/Dalmatian mix. Along with me came Jake – a chocolate lab. They were near the same age, but that was where all similarities ceased. Juneau was wary of new people and new dogs. To say the least, Jake and I weren’t on Juneau’s favored list. Jake, on the other hand, didn’t know the meaning of animosity; as far as he was concerned everyone was his friend. And that was only the start of differences between the two.

Juneau could sense a thunderstorm coming before the rest of us knew there was a cloud in the sky. He would cower on his rug, and by the time Stan and I could hear the thunder, Juneau’s poor body was trembling like a teenage boy headed to his first prom. Jake was sacked out on his own rug, the only moving part being his quivering upper lip as he blew snoring breaths past it.

Juneau was cautious about what he ate; often sniffing it several times before ever indulging. And sometimes he didn’t – as if whatever was offered wasn’t anything he wanted to waste his calories on. (If only I could be so disciplined!) He was a dainty eater, too. A large hamburger was chewed off in half a dozen bites. Not so with Jake. He would eat any chance he got and whatever was available. It wasn’t good enough to have the chocolate cake pushed back on the counter – it best be on top of the refrigerator or hidden in it. And a hamburger – you better look quick. One big gulp and it was on its way down the dark abyss.

Juneau was protective of “his space” unless it was Stan that was intruding within it. When I would walk by as he rested on the couch, he often narrowed his eyes and gave a warning growl – just loud enough to make sure I heard it. It didn’t matter who would walk by Jake – friend or stranger – that his tail didn’t start thumbing vigorously as his hazel eyes pleaded for a good long rub behind the ears.

Once Juneau finally grasped that Jake and I weren’t leaving he began working through his depression and little by little he began interacting with us. It was comical to watch his Australian Shepherd instincts kick in as he herded Jake around the house – from one room to another, occasionally snipping at Jake to steer him right where he wanted him to go.  Jake, even though he had thirty plus pounds on Juneau , played along. To him it was just more attention that he welcomed.

As I think about how Juneau herded Jake to make him go this way or that way, I am thankful that God doesn’t snip at us or push us in the direction He wants us to go. Instead, He leads us gently, inviting us to follow Him. In Psalms 18:33, King David proclaims, “He makes me as surefooted as a deer, leading me safely along the mountain heights.” Who couldn’t use a little guidance and leading when maneuvering through a difficult situation? King David was oh, so thankful for His leading, and so am I!

Until next month, keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin’.

If this style of writing appeals to you, check out my book page where you will find where to purchase my two Christian fiction novels.

 

 

 

 

 

I had a best friend growing up and his name was Barney. He was a big guy; weighing about 2000 pounds. Together with Daisy, they made up my dad’s draft horse team. His reddish brown coat was oh…so soft, and his big brown eyes were filled with compassion for the little girl that fed him an ear of corn every night following her run down the lane from the school bus. While he chomped on his ear I provided him with an earful of my own. I spared Barney nothing; he knew all my secrets.

He especially knew my disdain of going to school. After attending the little one room country school with just a handful of neighbor kids, “town school” was  a deep dark sea of intimidating eyes and unfamiliar faces. As I  stood at the edge of the playground watching the other first graders playfully interact, it did nothing but make me want to be home where I was secure and comfortable. I could only imagine what it would be like to join in with my frolicking classmates. No, I didn’t have severe asthma or polio. I wasn’t in a wheelchair, but I might as well have been because my shyness kept me imprisoned as if I was.

Grandpa Harley was a soft spoken, intuitive man. I had no idea he had been witnessing my heart pouring reunions with Barney from across the farmyard. And I for sure didn’t know he was working on a solution… not until Mr. Tom Allan from the Omaha World Herald showed up at school. He knocked on our classroom door and asked Mrs. Windenhausen if he could speak to me  in the hallway. I was shy, six, and scared. He tried to explain to me why he was there, but the only words that stood out to me was “your Grandpa Harley.” That gave me some reassurance that he wasn’t all bad and after a couple of questions, he let me slip back into the classroom.

My next encounter with Mr. Allan was at our kitchen table. Dad and Mom were conversing with him over coffee and donuts when I ran into the house after school that same day. This reassured me that I had nothing to fear for my “non-coffee” parents did not brew the stuff for those that they would rather see move on. Mom and Dad were able to translate what Mr. Allan had tried to tell me at school that morning. Grandpa Harley had written to him, telling him of a special bond between a little girl and a plow horse. It had sparked interest in the human interest writer’s mind.

Within the week, a picture of Barney and me graced the front page of  The Omaha World Herald. My family –  including parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles – made quite an ado about it. I would expect this from my family, but I hadn’t expected it from my classmates. The classmates living in town and who’s parents had subscriptions to the large newspaper, had seen it before I did as our copy would not arrive until the rural mail was delivered that afternoon. Some of the mothers had cut out the picture and sent it to school with their children to give to me. Mrs. Windenhausen held up a copy in front of the class and smiled as she congratulated me. I wasn’t sure what that was all about – I hadn’t done anything out of the ordinary.

But, with that experience, something not so ordinary began to happen within me. I now felt more at home in this classroom and the eyes all around me weren’t so intimidating anymore. The smiles on their faces warmed me and I soon found myself joining in on recess activities. I practiced and practiced Jacks at home in anticipation of being the Wimbledom champion of Jacks in the classroom. I couldn’t wait for recess to show off my skills.

It was years later before I realized what Grandpa Harley had done for me. I continued to be shy through high school – but not painfully so. Psalms 139 tells us that God has examined our hearts and knows everything about us. I do believe that Grandpa Harley was very intuitive, but I’m thinking, on this one – he had a little help from my Heavenly Father.

Until next month – keep on readin’ and I’ll keep on writin.”

If you like this style of writing, check out my book page for how to get copies of my two Christian fiction novels.